What I Think of Trump

The impression I get of Trump is that he is winging it, experimenting with what he thinks will get him the best (in other words, the most) response. (He said once that he wasn’t sure how his idea about building a wall would be received, but once it was met with cheers, he decided to keep on saying it.)

When he does go too far, he backs down, says he was kidding, or even denies that he said or did whatever it was that caused offense. As far as I can remember, the only time he apologized or admitted that he was wrong was when the “grab them by the pussy” tape surfaced. And that was only because the evidence was right there; he couldn’t deny that he’d said it. [He has since said that he doubts the authenticity of the tape.]

I wrote the first two paragraphs of this post on January 3, 2017.  Now it’s January 1, 2018, almost a year later. When I started this post, Trump hadn’t even been inaugurated yet. In almost three weeks, he will have been our President for a year. So what do I think of him now?

Well, for one thing, I think he is a terrible representative for the United States. Instead of making America great again, he has ripped our reputation as a world leader to shreds. The words at the base of the Statue of Liberty no longer apply. In the space of a year, the U.S. has gone from being a beacon of hope and a land of opportunity to an island built on suspicion and self-aggrandizement (much like Trump himself). The countries that still have positive opinions about the U.S. are those that are ruled by strongmen (which is what Trump aspires to be).

So far, it is Trump himself who draws the most fire, but the day is coming, if we continue on the course Trump is setting, when the democracies of the world will no longer look to the U.S. as an example worth emulating.  (With the exception of Israel, which is really happy right now since Trump announced his recognition of Jerusalem as its capital.)

I can’t help but wonder what Trumps means when he refers to a “great” America. Great for whom exactly? Certainly not for immigrants or Muslims. Or the millions of Americans who are teetering on the edge of losing their health insurance. Or those who still have moral values (and haven’t been seduced by politicians intent on staying in power). Or the poor, the young, the elderly, and the working class. Did I leave anyone out? Oh, yeah, corporations and the wealthy. That’s all Trump cares about.

Trump caters to his “base” by playing on their fears: terrorism, unemployment, a takeover by liberals and minorities. By telling them what he imagines they want to hear, he is able to pull off a magician’s trick and make their health care, their chances for upward mobility, and their ability to live in a free and equal society disappear. When he calls the media “fake news” and rails against the justice system when he doesn’t get his way, he is eroding the protections of the very Constitution he swore to defend.

I didn’t want to be right about Trump a year ago and I wish I was wrong about him today. I’m not like some people who say that he’s mentally ill or another Hitler. I don’t even think he should be impeached (partly because I feel just as negative about a President Pence). I just think that he’s a shallow, insensitive, egotistical blowhard who believes that he can shape the world into what he wants it to be, regardless of the consequences to others.

Trump is already one-fourth of the way through his time in office (God willing). If he hasn’t changed his behavior by now, he’s never going to. When January, 2019 (or 2020) rolls around, I don’t expect to see any improvement on his part. I only hope that he won’t have done too much damage to our democracy.

Maybe when the next presidential election comes around, the Democrats’ motto should be #MAAA (Make America America Again). I just hope we won’t be too late to pull it off.

Post-Election Hangover

Being a pessimist is supposed to be a bad thing, but it usually works well for me. It protects me from a lot of psychological turmoil. For instance, by holding dress rehearsals of the worst that could happen, I was able to wake up the morning after the election without an emotional hangover. I hadn’t spent the night high on hopes of a Clinton win; if anything, I was stone cold sober. I just didn’t trust the predictions that she was going to win. The polls looked too close to call it one way or another.

I was so sure that there was a very real possibility that Trump might win that I went to bed at 9 on election night. I had no interest in spending the whole evening stress eating and biting what little was left of my fingernails. Unfortunately I woke up around 1:30 and decided to check the results. Even though I’d been expecting it, it was still a shock when I saw how many electoral votes Trump had. I kept checking the news and people’s responses on Facebook as if somehow it would turn out to be a mistake. There was this disconnect between my intellect and my emotions. My mind was registering the reality but my spirit was wailing, “No! It can’t be!” Even though it hurt, like picking a scab on a wound, I made myself stay up for Trump’s victory speech. I didn’t get back to bed until 3:30 and I had to get up three hours later for work. I’m surprised that I got back to sleep at all.

Having Trump win was almost a relief, not just because it proved that my instincts were right, but also because it ended the suspense. Anticipating something that you fear is usually worse than coming face to face with it.

But I won’t lie, it is also deeply upsetting. What is hardest to swallow is the feeling that millions of Americans agree with Trump about women, sexual assault (“Boys will be boys.”), reproductive rights, immigrants, refugees and Muslims, torture, a free press, civil discourse, and, most of all, the importance of being honest. (I still can’t fathom how his supporters could harp on Clinton’s supposed dishonesty while Trump was repeatedly caught in half-truths, reversals, and out-and-out lies.)

I spent the first few days after the election in denial—except for when I would suddenly jerk “awake” and remember that he really was going to be our next president. (Actually, I still have that reaction whenever I hear or read the words “President Trump.”) I kept imagining his supporters gloating, and indeed, a lot of them have been, especially on social media. What pissed me off the most were the comments about how Clinton supporters/liberals/Democrats should stop their whining and get over it. As if they would have reacted any differently if Trump had lost.

Right now I feel like I’m in a holding pattern. I’m still expecting the worst, but I refuse to go down the road of crying, “The sky is falling!” just because the clouds are hanging low on the horizon.