Comments on: Why More Mothers Aren’t Feminists

By: Ellen Keim

Ellen Keim — Wed, 31 Mar 2010 03:49:39 +0000

I cringe when I read about or hear of women who have been put down for being mothers. What more important job is there really than being a parent? The crime in this society is that we don’t support parents, and especially mothers (because they bear the brunt of child-raising) so that they can raise their children and still be persons in their own right. Good for you, that you’re doing what you think is best for yourself AND your child. And shame on feminists who judge you negatively.This one doesn’t.

By: Jackie

Jackie — Tue, 30 Mar 2010 01:14:02 +0000

I think that people judge to hardly mothers and wives. I can’t believe how many people rip me apart or make harsh comments about being too young to marry or have kids. Especially in college, I hear it all the time “I’ll never be stupid enough to marry before (such and such age), and I’m deffinitly not stupid enough to have children!” then they ask me, and I’ll admit to them I am 23, married, and have one kid, however, I’m up on current events, I attend a university, I have thoughts and opinions among other things. It really bugs me when working mothers tear down stay-at-home moms. Some of these situations we couldn’t control, some we choose, and some we just make the best of, no one has the right to judge or rip you apart on those situations!

By: Ellen Keim

Ellen Keim — Sat, 20 Feb 2010 11:54:26 +0000

Thanks for your thoughtful comments. It’s nice to know that I’m not the only one who was scared by the prospect of raising a girl! And how nice that you have a boy as well, so you can learn from both your children how they’re being socialized and what they really want to do and be.

I had all girls (four) and it wasn’t until my grandson came along that I began to really see things from a male’s point of view. I found out that boys and girls are more similar than they are different, but that there are some differences, mainly in the way that they play. Do you find the same thing, or am I just being influenced by what I was raised to expect from the sexes?

Ellen

By: Margaret

Margaret — Sat, 20 Feb 2010 09:58:35 +0000

A good deal of your bullet points about why moms aren’t feminists hit on several of the issues that I struggled with when my kids were toddlers. The point about becoming feminist once a woman becomes a mom really resonated with me–that is my story as a feminist.

In my late teens, early-twenties, I had some feminist views, but resisted the moniker of feminist–and frankly held assumptions very similar to the previous commenter. A few years later, mid-to-late-twenties, I was heavily involved in climbing the so-called ladder in Corporate America. I was a feminist, but refused the moniker. When I was 31, pregnant with my first child, I learned that I was carrying a girl–and I wept. Not because I had been harboring a secret hope for a boy, but because the task of raising a girl in our patriarchal society daunted me *so much* that I feared I wasn’t up to the task. How could I do this? I didn’t think I was equipped.

It was during those first few years of motherhood that I acknowledged exactly who I was–yes, a Feminist!–but not before an internal struggle over many of the issues you point out as reasons moms *aren’t* feminists. I stayed at home with the kids, I no longer ran in the ‘rat race’, and I had issues with being viewed as ‘just a mom’ after so many years with a career in the male-dominant financial services industry.

Being a parent has changed me, and it’s changed my husband–and the kind of people, in the form of our son and our daughter, that we, both feminists, leave behind will also be feminists…in fact, at 6 & 8 years old, I seeing signs that they already are…

Thanks for a great piece!

By: sanity

sanity — Tue, 19 Jan 2010 01:38:37 +0000

My firm belief is that the majority of the feminist organizations is comprised of the unattractive, slightly obese-obese women that were made fun of in school. Women have many unfair advantages in the world today. All because of all this feminist crap, just be happy you can earn the same wage and have the same rights as a man for once.

P.S.- I’m a women too.